I've never used eye cream before last night. They were talking on The View the other day(I know, I know, I'm embarrassed to tell you I was watching that...a separate confession all it's own) about how in your 30s you must be using it, dahling (ooops...I'm five years behind) so I bought this because I'm a highly suggestible slave to PR. It looks big in the picture, doesn't it? Ahhhh, nope. It's the size of a carmex tub (if even that) and it cost $20. To top it off, there weren't even directions with it. Just a bullsh*t description of some "miracle" tree that gives the cream its super-special, eye-saving, death-defying, world-hunger-relieving properties which explains why this tiny dollop of cream costs so damn much and aren't you lucky you purchased it at such a great price? So, I patted it on and hoped I did it right. Yeah, I needed directions for eye cream. Einstein, I'm not.
I don't know how to apply eye shadow. I rarely use it and when I do, I look like a racoon on crank.
I don't iron. Ever. Even though we do own one. I can't tell you where it is.
I'm not fashion-savvy. I've heard of Prada, Givenchy and Jimmy Choo, but I don't give a rat's ass about them. I love living in a town where fashion is hardly ever on anyone's radar. Makes life simpler and cheaper if we all agree to go around in $11 Old Navy yoga pants and Cover Girl makeup.
With that being said, my new guilty pleasure is Project Runway. I am nothing if not "a riddle wrapped in mystery inside an enigma."