Alternative to the World Cup

Delaney vs. Babies at Gym Daycare
Delaney - 1, Babies - 0, Mama - 0

The scratching continues. In fact today, she drew blood. From a helpless 6-month old baby. I was appropriately apalled when the careworkers told me. They'd placed Delaney in a playpen to isolate her from the other kids. I understand why they did that, but it broke my heart to see her all alone and calling out for me just the same.

The careworker who takes a nasty delight in telling me about Delaney's scratching came at me again with, "Did you buy some books? Have you read them? I really think you need to read some books to figure out how to make this stop!" Yeah, lady. I got books. I could open up a preconception, pregnancy, first-year-of-baby's life, disciplining-your-kid bookstore and never sell out. That's how many damn books I've got. And what, exactly, do these books say about babies who scratch? They all say the same thing. That this is typical for the age. That toddlers do this to see what kind of reaction they'll get. That you can sternly, yet gently, tell them to stop and that what they are doing hurts others and that it's not nice. But, they also say you shouldn't make a big deal out of it, otherwise the toddler will continue the scratching to see if they can get that huge reaction out of you again.

Part of the trouble is that I'm rarely with Delaney when she plays with other kids. She sees kids at the gym but, as I'm running my bootie off on the treadmill (yeah, right), I'm not there to correct any unpleasant behavior. I've asked the careworkers to tell her not to scratch when she does it, but I've also told them that I don't want them to make too big a deal of it. In the end, I have no control over exactly how they correct her since I'm not there when it happens. I guess we need some playdates or something so I can be there when/if she tries to scratch. Other than that, I'm at a loss.

Comments

[karen]

My suggestion is to carefully trim her fingernails right down to the tips of her fingers, including rounding off the edges (I used to use the medium-rough side of a buffing block). Even if Delaney makes a scratching motion, she shouldn't draw blood if her nails are kept short and round.

[Colleen]

Good point, Karen! I forgot to mention that I felt so guilty about this particular scratch because Roger and I had planned to cut Delaney's nails that very morning and forgot. We won't forget again, that's for sure!

[Heather]

The careworker sounds like an idiot. Since she knows Delaney MIGHT scratch the baby, why doesn't she distract her before this happens?

Lauren was in fulltime daycare when she was the same age as Delaney, and incidents happened pretty regularly. Her teachers just reported what happened and what was done about it. At that age, it isn't really as though you can discuss the bad behavior later and try to modify it...

Hang in there...this phase will pass.

[Stephanie]

I think setting up some playdates sounds like the best idea. So.... yu and Roger just move to Atlanta and we can hang out with the girls all day long. :-)

[Binkytown]

Yikes! Scratching! Well at least it's not biting right? Mine is into slapping at the moment- me, the dog, the bag of recycled paper on the floor. Its hard to find that balance of not making a big deal of it, yet being firm enough to teach them that its not nice. Good luck with the scratching!