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It may just also be a factor of her age. I believe my Emma is older than Delaney but just the other day at Chik fil -a, she pinched a girl older than her and the girl's mother was none too pleased. Either was the crying little girl. I also remember Emma following a younger boy (last year sometime) only to tackle him and bite him for no reason. I don't believe you have the one child who is behaving poorly, they all seem to have their moments and gradually, with work and patience, they will get through it. You working so closely at the little gym sounds absolutely perfect but yes, the whole reason I take them to the gym is so that I can work out and not worry about what is going on in the daycare. I'm sorry to hear about the gym director's involvement. She must not have kids herself?!


Hailey had a boy in her class who bit her...a lot. The daycare director was really apologetic but I really felt worse for the boys mom because I knew that she was banging her head against the wall to get him to stop. They finally figured out that he was biting Hailey because he just liked her so dang much that he couldn't find another way to express it. Like hugging her...with his teeth. They encouraged them to play more together and eventually the biting faded away.

Maybe Delaney just wants so badly to interact with the child but doesn't know how to do it yet? Regardless, don't beat yourself up over it. It'll pass with time...and bactine.


The weather IS fantastic. I took the boy to the lapsit and park in our area today, too, and it was just lovely. Can we lock this in? I'll take it every day.

Okay, I know that the gym people are trying ot protect the other kids, but obviously they aren't taking the time with her that she needs. You have spoken to them about this at least a dozen times, explaining you you are trying to correct the problem and I don't know why they would - even politely - threaten to kick her out. Perhaps a meeting with the day care center director is in order? So you can explain taht you are doing things outside of the gym to help curb the behavior, because they likely think that you aren't really doing much when that is not the case at all. Every. single. kid. does stuff like this. It is a part of growing up. My boy has pushed Delaney before and he sometimes does that to other kids as well. I tell him it is wrong and help in say "sorry" and, though it has taken some time, he's getting the hang of it. At this age (about 1 to three years) kids have very little impulse control. They can't help but want what another kid has. They don't know all of the proper ways to show frustration or even appreciation. Goodness. If they can't handle kid's quirks, they shouldn't be in child care.

And you wonder why I'm reluctant to join the gym.


Ahh . . . jealous over your weather. It should arrive here by morning and I'm SO looking forward to it.

About Delaney, all of the above advice sounds good to me as does your approach. Keeping her away from others won't solve the problem and hovering will certainly help. I like MamaChristy's idea of speaking to the gym daycare director. I'm sure other parents aren't happy about their kids getting scratched, but surely this isn't the first such incident and we're talking about a one year old, not some older kid bully who should know better.

Good luck and keep us posted!



I think it's a great idea to do the library activities. What a lot of fun for both of you!

It sounds to me like the problem with the gym daycare is poor supervision. One of the lessons we learned when we began taking 12 month old Lauren to daycare was that kids bite, kick, and scratch. Your kid was going to bite, kick, and/or scratch another kid, and was probably going to get bit, kicked, and/or scratched. Sure, getting an incident report was upsetting. Particularly, for me, anyway, when it was my kid doing the behavior.

One thing strikes me though, Colleen. The daycare we used NEVER put a kid under 2 in time out because they don't understand it. They would first encourage the kid to stop, think, and make a better choice. "Delaney, stop and think. Let's play with the ball with Lisa instead of scratch her. Better choice." And if need be, separate the child and distract her with something else.


I think part of me actually curled up and died the first time we got the "Behavior Report" saying my kid had bitten another kid. Mortified didn't begin to cover it! The longer it went on, the worse I felt, as if everyone thought I sat at home coaching him to bite people. Eventually, I figured out that anyone who really thought I might do that didn't actually have kids - anyone with kids knows that it's just something kids do. Parents discourage it (exactly as you're doing!) and eventually the kid moves on to some other annoying habit which must be trained out.

I wish you patience and luck and better cooperation with care at the gym. I'm with Heather...Delaney is too young for time out to be useful!

Mrs. Flinger

Um. You got a ton of great advice here so I won't feel bad that I have none ot offer. But, I know LB is a lot like Delaney and I'm doing the same things you are. Trying to place her in those places she'll have to learn to be civil. It's slowly happening but we did go through the hitting/spitting phase, too. (scratching some) And it seems to be getting better. I bet you just keep doing what you are and it'll click. You're probably right on with the wheaning thing.

And see? I thought I had no advice. :-)

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